We Have Always Been Here: A Queer Muslim Memoir

Hijra is a broad third-gender category in south Asia with many different regional names; in Pakistan, they are called the “Khawaja Sira.” This third-gender category loosely correlates to transgender women as understood in English. Historically, they have been recognized by their respective cultures and, like many third genders around the world, have held special significance in religious and ceremonial practices. British colonization introduced European ideals of the gender binary, which led to the outlawing and discrimination against the hijra through the Criminal Tribes Act of 1871 and the Indian Penal Code of 1860. Today, hijra and transgender communities in south Asia still struggle against colonial legacies and ideas about gender.

Habib encounters a hijra woman at the end of Chapter 1. This encounter is a formative childhood memory for Habib: The woman is their first encounter with gender nonconformity and LGBTQ+ identity as the hijra woman openly flirts with men and dances in public despite the precarious position of hijra women in Pakistani society.

Islamophobia is an aggregation of prejudices, unconscious biases, and unfair assumptions toward Muslim people. Islamophobia can range from the interpersonal, such as assuming a Muslim will not accept LGBTQ+ people, or the big-picture political, such as using Muslim people as a scapegoat for political issues in non-Islamic countries or attempting to exclude Muslims from political or community life.

Patriarchy is a social organization that influences governmental structures and divides people into two classes, men and women. Patriarchy dictates political, economic, and cultural privilege to men while excluding and exploiting women as a political class. Patriarchal cultures systematically disempower women as a political class to make them reliant on men for survival. Patriarchy also refers to the ideological reasonings that underpin these cultural and political systems, such as the idea that women are “naturally” nurturing and enjoy housework.

Patriarchy relies on the assumption that people are all cisgender and heterosexual in order to function because patriarchy requires two clearly delineated classes of people who interact with one another in pre-prescribed ways. Patriarchy is responsible for Yasmin’s narrowed scope of what is possible in life and Habib’s own struggles to come to terms with their gender and sexuality. The ideology of patriarchy leads Habib and their family to assume that they must be attracted to men, that they must have a husband, and that this arrangement must make for a fulfilling life. Patriarchy also constructs the conditions that Yasmin wishes to protect Habib from by arranging a marriage: Husbands are allowed to domestically abuse their wives as a result of patriarchy, while the men who harass Yasmin on the streets are emboldened by the power patriarchy gives them over women.

“Queer” is a pejorative reclaimed by some members of the LGBTQ+ community. Originally a slur, it now denotes a wide range of labels and identities under the LGBTQ+ umbrella and is sometimes used as a label in its own right. “Queer” is often used to communicate identities in a non-normative way to make them difficult to classify, stereotype, and put in preconceived boxes. It may also mean that somebody has a complex relationship with one of the more traditional identities in the LGBTQ+ community. One person might use “queer” to mean that they are masculine-presenting and attracted to men, while another might use queer to signal that they are transgender. “Genderqueer” is another variant used exclusively for gender, though “queer” is just as applicable to gender.

Habib uses “queer” to refer to their sexuality. For Habib, it means being attracted to women. Younger LGBTQ+ people tend to feel an affinity with the label due to its slipperiness. As a reclaimed slur, caution should be used when applying the word to others or using it when not part of the LGBTQ+ community.