The Guncle Abroad

“An invitation, he surmised, which was the last thing he wanted—when this movie wrapped he was booking a trip for himself somewhere far away from everyone else (or at least all the people he knew).”

Patrick is in a vulnerable place in the beginning of The Guncle Abroad, having recently broken up with his long-term boyfriend and exhausted from his work on set. He wants to travel to reset himself and prepare for his next big steps. The final thought in parentheses introduces his character trait of using humor when dealing with problems, as he sardonically recognizes that the people in his life are not making him happy.

“‘And we’ll meet you in Italy for the wedding. It’ll take their minds off things, and who knows. Maybe it will be good for all three of us.’ Patrick hoped that would once again prove to be true. ‘Just don’t expect another wedding gift. Oven mitts or a casserole dish.’”

Patrick offers to take Maisie and Grant on a trip across Europe and hopes that the restorative properties of travel that he uses for himself will have an impact on them as well. The reference to “[o]ven mitts or a casserole dish” parodies domestic bliss when Greg and Livia’s marriage is unconventional and in jeopardy.

“What I’m trying to say is that you were skeptical of me at first, but we get on pretty good now. You were skeptical of Emory, but then you ended up liking him once we got together. So you never really know until you give people a chance.”

Patrick’s efforts to convert Maisie and Grant to the side of supporting Greg’s marriage rest on reminding them of the changes in the last few years. Rowley uses colloquial language such as “get on pretty good” to highlight the way Patrick attempts to make himself relatable to teenagers.

“But he had to sell the kids on all the good that could make them happy. He felt certain of it, even if they were not. They were young still, they needed that.”

Though Maisie and Grant do not want Livia to be their new mother, Patrick believes that there will be positives to having a mother figure in their lives. He wants them to open their minds to what Livia can provide to them as a caretaker and the happiness it may bring. This is a key moment of Patrick’s character arc, as he feels certainty that unravels throughout the novel.

“That was the thing about love; even its harshest critics were not immune, love finding its way into even the darkest spaces.”

Patrick teaches the kids about love, and in the process, he meditates upon love himself. He knows that no one can resist love forever and hopes that Maisie, despite her efforts, will learn about love and change her point of view of Livia. This passage foreshadows Emory’s arrival in Italy during one of Patrick’s darkest moment.

“He would teach these kids about love, how to love others, and how to be loved in return. Was he the best conduit for this lesson in the wake of his own breakup? He hoped the kids wouldn’t ask. But the best teachers were also students, as learning was never done.”

Though he means to teach Maisie and Grant about love to help them accept Livia, Patrick wonders if he can speak with authority after his break up with Emory. His rhetorical questions convey his uncertainty since they refute answer, and he hopes that no one else will attempt to answer these questions.

“It was natural that Livia would want to make space for herself in this family, but that didn’t have to mean it was nefarious or that it had the consequences they feared.”

Grant and Maisie are unsure of Livia because they believe that she will try to erase Sara’s memory and legacy. Patrick knows that it is natural for Livia to want to be a part of the family but does not believe that she is doing so maliciously, like the children expect. Rowley hence subverts the wicked stepmother trope and creates a more complex character in Livia who has both desires and respect for the family she enters.

“That’s right. She always wanted to take this tour, and now we’re here taking it for her because we love her. And in that sense she’s here with us.”

Patrick continues his efforts to help Maisie and Grant heal from the tragic loss of their mother in The Guncle Abroad. One way he does so is by bringing them on the official Sound of Music tour, something Sara always wanted to do. The tour keeps Sara present in the lives of Maisie and Grant, but it is also a positive portrayal of a new woman entering a family after the death of the children’s mother.

“The man could hardly take his eyes off his wife, even though Patrick imagined they had been together for decades; indeed, her face glowed in the last of the day’s sun. Maybe they came every summer, maybe they had saved their whole lives for a trip like this.”

In Venice, Patrick sees an old couple and can tell that they have serious and meaningful love for each other. He recognizes the way they look at and treat each other, demonstrating their strong commitment for one another. The romanticized imagery of a glowing face in sunset reflects Patrick’s idealized view of them.

“Patrick laughed. It was a perfectly valid observation to make, but it was also flat and laced with potential judgment—mechanical instead of warm. He knew Livia well enough to know she was less critical than people thought, but he also understood why the kids had trouble reading her.”

When Patrick interacts with Livia, he understands why Maisie and Grant do not like her and cannot seem to understand her intentions. However, he finds her kind and likes her, providing indirect characterization of Livia.

“‘The truth is, they don’t know for years how I tried to be a mother.’ Livia’s eyes welled and she did not make any effort to hide it. Patrick recognized a very real struggle, one she endured without shame, and in that moment he felt deeply for her.”

Livia is often characterized in The Guncle Abroad through others’ eyes, as stories and opinions from Maisie dominate the narrative. However, when she interacts with Patrick and others, it is clear how genuine her love and care for Maisie and Grant is, as she does in fact want to be their mother.

“Patrick felt a jealousy weighing him down as Greg encouraged the kids to pick up their pace. How could he feel in such competition with a woman he had not yet even met?”

Patrick forms a rivalry with Palmina, even before he meets Livia. Both Maisie and Grant constantly discuss how great she is, making Patrick jealous that he is losing his influence with the children and being replaced by Palmina. His feeling of being out of sync with their desires is reflected in the juxtaposition of feeling weighed “down” just as Greg instructs the children to speed “up.”

“Patrick reclined again in his chair and closed his eyes. It was so much easier to attend to the kids with a partner. With Clara there he felt free to relax and trust that someone would pick up the slack.”

When Patrick and Clara both watch Maisie and Grant at the beach, Patrick understands why Greg needs another partner, even if it will be rocky for the children. His internal monologue reflects this ease, as it becomes more focused on his own feelings after he closes his eyes. A partner makes it easier to handle children and allows both people in the partnership not to be constantly attending to others.

“But when Patrick had introduced Greg to his best friend, his own relationship with Sara suffered. Would he want to share Cassie the way he had once had to share Sara? No was the obvious answer; Patrick didn’t like to share much of anything, let alone his one female friend.”

When Patrick briefly thinks of hypothetically setting his assistant Cassie up with his brother Greg, he remembers how his relationship with Sara suffered when she began dating Greg. Patrick does not like sharing, and could not manage the split attention between Sara and Greg. Rowley uses hypophora—posing a question immediately followed by an answer—to highlight Patrick’s certainty that “[n]o was the obvious answer.”

“Patrick hung his head in defeat as they exited the lobby. Grant asking Palmina about love languages? Maisie thinking someone beautiful in a dress? Clara wanting to get drunk? This was going to be a long night, indeed.”

Patrick struggles with change in The Guncle Abroad and often feels left out as he realizes that the people around him are growing into different people as they age. Rowley piles questions together in quick succession to reflect Patrick’s overwhelm at all of these changes, intensified by the italicized exclamation about Clara.

“[I]f you could get them to give an honest answer, they would tell you that they’re afraid of their civilization crumbling further under the weight of advancement. They’re both furious little archaeologists trying to unearth it with those teeny brushes as fast as the present is busy burying it under more sand.”

When Greg finally asks Patrick what Maisie and Grant are so afraid of with Livia, Patrick admits that they do not want change to erase their mother and the life she helped them build. Rowley uses an archeological metaphor to convey how out of their depth the children feel attempting to change an adult world.

“Love is something special to be protected. Because if you don’t protect it, if you don’t honor it as something rare and precious, it’s easy to walk away from. I did that, and I regret it.”

At the rehearsal dinner, Patrick gives a speech about the need to protect love. He references his own inability to do so, and Rowley hence draws several of the novel’s conflicts together, drawing a comparison between Patrick and Emory and Greg and Livia. This builds tension surrounding the central question of what will happen to each relationship.

“Anyone who had tasted flat champagne would know what he meant. The same was true of relationships—you introduce too much air and the bond between any two people could fizzle. In this case, kids were a lot of ether.”

As Patrick reflects on the nature of relationships, he draws a comparison to champagne that goes flat. The reference to a luxury item again draws a connection between the opulent setting and romantic relationships and suggests that true and lasting love is a real luxury. He understands that love is not always forever and that sometimes it fades.

“‘Have I done anything other than fall more in love with you with each passing year? As ridiculous as you are?’ Patrick whispered, ‘No.’”

When Emory surprises Patrick in Italy, Patrick finally admits his insecurities about his aging. Emory assures him that he does not care about Patrick’s age and reaffirms his love. The fact that Patrick whispers conveys his shocked attempts to process this groundbreaking information.

“Meanwhile Patrick had done his best to make headway with Maisie, but her general discomfort led to her standing her ground, lest she expose even more vulnerability by allowing a public change of heart.”

Maisie will not budge in her dislike of Livia, not only because she does not want her to marry Greg but also because she does not want to be wrong. This passage characterizes her stubbornness, which is an example of her commitment to Sara as well as her teenage angst.

“Clara and Emory hadn’t started on the right foot when they met five summers before, but she had been wrong about him, and over the years she admitted as much.”

Clara did not initially like Emory, but as she grew to know him better, she admitted she was wrong. The sweeping reference to the intervening time period between The Guncle and The Guncle Abroad, “over the years,” is an example of how Rowley bridges the gap between the two novels and creates a sense of realism in that their lives have continued in the interim.

“Why do you bicker with Grant? Gay men and lesbians are brothers and sisters. And sometimes you tease your family because you love them the most.”

Patrick’s rivalry with Palmina is not just based on their competing influence over Maisie and Grant but also in their differing identities within the LGBTQIA+ community. Though Patrick and Palmina bicker, Patrick is sure to remind his niece and nephew that he and Palmina are more connected than divided.

“Of course we can make this work. We’re so silly. Overthinking everything. Trying to make the right mark on the world. And yet one day, not that long from now, someone will think of us for the very last time and we will be forgotten from the universe entirely.”

Emory does his best to calm Patrick’s nerves after the wedding, promising him that they can make it work. His assurances highlight The Impact of Love on Self-Perception, as their relationship helps to calm Patrick’s anxiety and but his worries into perspective.